Warding Off Disaster

It's no wonder that we read of the high use of anxiety medication in the US and particularly among the frum population.  I say the following without having done any actual research on this; this is just the sense that I have about changing times.

Although there were always sad stories and troubling world events, the frequency of tragedies and how close to home they reach, seems unprecedented in the past 50 years.  For example, when I was a young adult, I probably heard of Lou Gehrig's disease (ALS) but that's as far as it went.  At this point, I've been menachem avel someone's whose brother died of it, the rebbetzin of my former shul is suffering from it, my friend's father died of it, and I have heard and read of several more in the frum world.

Another example, up until ten years ago, I don't think I heard of any child (not talking about an infant) dying in their sleep.  Now I can think of three.

The feeling that something can drastically change for the bad, out of the blue, is reasonable since it has been happening with seemingly greater frequency and to people we know or to people close to those we know.  The Twin Towers coming down, the Har Nof shul massacre, the frequent ads from Chai Lifeline and RCCS reinforce the possibility of a disaster about to happen.

What to do about it? One idea - Rabbi David Ashear is quite popular now.  He does a 4 minute daily emuna message which can be heard on the phone: (605) 475-4799 access code 840886# or received by email: Emunadaily@gmail.com

"Who will Live and Who will Die"

As I perused the headlines one day last week, I saw the following news items:

Woman killed by bee stings.

Man killed by bear.

Woman died after being hit by a cyclist.

Bee, Bear, Bike.  Bizarre deaths.

All decreed a year ago on Rosh Hashana.

I've read and heard the following suggestion.  Make a list of all the positive and negative things that happened last year that had an impact on you.  It should include personal events in your life as well as national and global events.  Then ponder the idea that all these events were decreed a year ago on Rosh Hashana. 

Now, during the Aseres Yimei Teshuva, we have a unique opportunity to affect the course of history for the coming year.  Carpe diem.

All for the Sake of Israel

An article about the devastation left in the wake of a tornado in Oklahoma speaks about the tears and our hearts going out to the people there.  Many (most) of us just go on with our lives. 

As mentioned in the previous post, there are just so many news items about death and bereavement and sorry states of affairs that we are exposed to.  In recent days we have had a Moslem hacking a person to death on the streets of London, a tornado, over 1000 people killed in Bangladesh, a bizarre conclusion to the case of missing women in Cleveland, a chilul Hashem trial concerning sordid matters in Lakewood, constant reports and updates about the travesty at the Wall and in the Israeli government.  It's overwhelming. 

So what tears for Oklahoma? How many of us cried over the destruction in Oklahoma? At the very least, we should be thinking that when we hear of a flood in a far-off land, or an epidemic, or war, or famine, the purpose is to bring us closer to G-d. "No misfortune comes into the world unless it is for the sake of Israel" (Yevamos 63A), "in order to cause them to fear G-d and to return in repentance" (Rashi, ibid.)

It helps if, as the article says, "We can stop for a moment and consider the enormity of the devastation." Perhaps to look at some pictures.  To think about how this relates to us.  It's hard to do. I know that in order for something to hit home for me, it usually has to be personalized.  When you read stories about individuals, it makes more of an impact.  And no question, when something happens to your family, i.e. to your fellow Jews, it affects us more.

 

Information Overload

From a blog called Susan's Musings:

... I have been deluged with reports of serious illnesses with requests to add the sick to my prayers, articles about the tragic death of a young girl in a pedestrian accident and links to introspective pieces about troubled marriages, mental illness and other challenging life experiences.

Relatively few years ago, I would not have known of much of this... While I knew of sad occurrences taking place in my local and intimate social circle, word of personal tragedies around the world didn’t intrude into my space....

Prior to the ubiquitous presence of the Internet in my life, the tragedies in the lives of those I know were offset by the joys. Yes, I heard of a friend’s stillborn infant or a relative who was diagnosed with cancer, but at least as frequently and usually more often, I heard of an engagement, a birth or other celebratory events. Now that everyone is connected to everyone else, I am asked to add my prayers to those of thousands of others around the world, pleading for a complete recovery for people I have never met or previously heard about...

The urgent emails notifying me of crises are not offset by joyous reports... I’m invited to share in the sorrows but never told of the celebrations or the normal, uneventful daily lives that pass without horrifying interruptions.

This is our reality. We can access news non-stop and disseminate information at the click of a mouse. Geographic distance is no barrier to communication. This is, in many ways, a wonderful advance. Yet, it carries with it the danger of being overwhelmed by gloom.  We can come to expect bad rather than good...

How true.  If you check in with each of the frum news websites, you will find out about frum people involved in car accidents, sudden deaths, fires, drownings, operations about to take place, disasters of all kinds.  It's relentless.  It's news.  It's not only that we are connected globally.  It's that we are updated constantly. 

Years ago, you may have gotten the Jewish newspaper which was published once a week.  You may have tuned in to a Jewish radio program that was broadcast once a week.  Now, in addition to frequent Internet updates and emails, we have many weekly (even daily) newspapers and magazines.  They've got to fill them up and we have been getting a surfeit of articles addressing all our frum societal problems as well as first person "sharing" of all kinds of tragic lives with details that we might be better off not knowing.

Nobody says you must visit news sites and nobody says you must read frum publications.  The alternative though, is to be disconnected from our Jewish brethren which is not an option.  How to do this while remaining positive is a challenge.

Being Informed

How much "news" must we know?

The two extremes are: 1) keeping up with all the news on a daily basis, news in the Jewish world and news in the world at large, via print material, radio, and/or online news sites  2) no reading or listening, remaining oblivious to what's going on unless personally told by someone.

I've tried to do what I thought was "middle of the road," follow the news on a regular but not obssessive basis, scanning the headlines on Jewish news sites and clicking to read further on particular items of interest.  However, over the past many weeks I have taken a break from most of it because I was becoming increasingly perturbed by the onslaught of negativity.  In Jewish news there were the sad news items (child falls from porch), the scandalous news items (yet another frum person arrested or caught doing something wrong), the what's-wrong-with-us news items detailing how frum society is on the brink of disaster for a myriad of reasons.  In general news there were plenty of downbeat items.

What is it costing us when we allow ourselves to be exposed to daily negativity? I think it's robbing us of our simchas ha'chaim - joie de vivre.  Considering that our frum publications have been informing us of the problem of depression in our midst, perhaps one step to take to increase our positivity and bitachon is to avoid voluntarily reading an excess of negative material. 

Even better, how about letting publishers of magazines and news sites know that we want to read upbeat, inspirational news items? There are plenty of wonderful things happening all around us.  Instead of yet another article telling us about formerly frum kids and their deterioration, how about an article about frum kids and their accomplishments in learning, derech eretz, and chesed? Instead of hearing about the tragedy of marriages breaking up or not happening in the first place, how about articles about people happily married for decades? As for chesed and wonderful initiatives on the part of groups and individuals, there is endless material!

Yidden zennen gut! Let's hear about it!