27 Nissan: The yartzeit of Rabbi Avigdor Miller z"l

Rabbi Miller passed away 16 years ago. Although I only attended one of the famous Thursday night classes one time, I listened to dozens of his tapes and felt that I owed him the respect of attending his funeral.

He was a remarkable man for his time (he was born in 1908). Not too many young men were raised frum in America, and of those who were, not many remained religious. He was one of the few. He was also one of the few to make the trip to the famous yeshiva in Slabodka in Europe to learn Torah. His brother Yeshaya followed his older brother there and became a rav in Boston.

What stands out about him to me are:

his discipline - every moment was accounted for
his focus on Shaar Ha'Bechina of Chovos Ha'Levavos
his hasmada
his focus on bitachon and gratitude
his humor and simcha
his talk about love for Hashem
his outreach, i.e. teaching Torah to people on all levels
his principles like only speaking Yiddish in the home
his being an American gadol
his emphasis on "asei lecha rav" and living in a makom Torah
his having a program for every goal with exercises, breaking it down into steps, leading his kehilla step by step
the supremacy of Torah learning
his half hour walk every day
his being a non-conformist
his outspokenness

His teachings are widely spread today by his books, MP3 lectures, and emails.

yehi zichro boruch

What Does it Mean to Serve Hashem?

R' Manis Friedman, a popular Lubavitcher public speaker, likes to tell of his night-long dialogue with a non-Chassidic kollel guy about whether Hashem needs us, whether we need to have rachmanus on Him for making Himself vulnerable to our freedom of choice. The kollel guy says Hashem is perfect, how He can need anything?!

MF says, needing a mitzva is not an imperfection. But let's say it is. What would you prefer that Hashem is perfect or that Hashem needs you?

Kollel guy said, that He's perfect.

MF asks, why do you need Him to be perfect?

Kollel guy says, because if He's not perfect, I won't serve him.

MF says, if you're right that Hashem doesn't need anything, what does it mean ivdu es Hashem – what kind of service can you do?

Kollel guy said that's the one thing I never understood ...  By telling me that Hashem needs my mitzva, you're turning me off. If He needs it, let Him do it!

Mf: If you did not need anything, you wouldn't be a human being. To say that Hashem needs, makes people uncomfortable because our needs are seen as weaknesses.

Yes, there are needs that are weaknesses like eating and sleeping, but a need like friendship makes us human. If Hashem needs something, that makes Him a living G-d.

 

*****

Just because the Kollel guy never came up with an answer for what it means to serve Hashem, doesn't mean there isn't an answer that doesn't require G-d needing something.  In Chovos Ha'Levavos, written by a Rishon, there is an entire section on the Service of G-d - Shaar Avodas Ha'Elokim. 

In it (in the edition with R' Avigdor Miller's commentary, p. 66, 72), it says the definition of avoda is the feeling of humility of someone who receives a benefit. 

What can we do for Hashem? Nothing, because Hashem does not need anything.  But one thing we can do for Him is make something out of ourselves.  How do we do this? By working to show our gratitude for what He does for us. Avoda is the service of Hashem that comes from a feeling of gratitude.

We contemplate His greatness, His wisdom, and everything He has done for us.  It includes thinking of all the things He does in the world that reveal His presence.  All the mitzvos of the Torah are only an introduction to this career of avoda.

Maintaining Dignity

In today's day and age, maintaining dignity is not high on people's list of priorities.  People (out in the world) dress in undignified ways, talk in undignified ways, and share personal information that undermines their dignity. 

R' Avigdor Miller was known for his shoot from the hip style.  He famously said, don't tell your spouse about the C you got in chemistry! People tell derogatory information about themselves for no purpose, seemingly for the sake of "being honest" and "accept me as I am."  R' Miller saw no purpose in this; on the contrary, he considered it detrimental.

He also told his Beis Yaakov students, not to wash the floor when their husbands were around.  No doubt, this was to preserve their dignity, especially back in the day when floors were washed on hands and knees.

It is an act of Ahavas Yisrael when we protect a person's dignity, by not looking at things that shouldn't be stared at, by ignoring those things that people say or do that are silly, by enabling them to maintain a façade and not "blowing their cover." 

"A Divine Madness" cont.

 

In his lectures, Rabbi Miller spoke about his experiences in Europe on the eve of the war.  He was an American boy who was one of the few to make the voyage to learn in European yeshivos.  I remember hearing him describe, over twenty-five years ago, how he witnessed the chilul Shabbos in Slabodka. 

R' Miller, being an iconoclast, did not follow the frum party line which focused exclusively on the great yeshivos of Lithuania.  He described the deterioration of religious Jewry.  Although he spoke about this, apparently he did not feel that his manuscript about the Holocaust should be published in his lifetime. 

A very prevalent question asked by the irreligious and religious in the decades following the war was, "Where was G-d in the Holocaust."  This was (maybe still is) a question that kiruv rabbis had to expect.  R' Miller's book is his response to that question as the subtitle is, R' Avigdor Miller's Defense of Hashem in the Matter of the Holocaust." His position can be summarized as: the Holocaust was a fulfillment of what it states explicitly in the Torah, if you abandon Hashem, He will abandon you and you will suffer tremendously. 

"Blame the victim" implies that someone undeserving of pain, suffering, and sorrow is being accused of deserving pain, suffering and sorrow.  The premise of R' Miller's book is that the Torah spells out what we must do and what will happen if we don't do it.  Were we or weren't we faithful to Hashem?

The facts are, European Jewry, to a great extent, was comprised of Zionists, freethinkers, Bundists, Socialists, Communists, and Yiddishists.  Frum families were losing children rapidly to the secular world.  Sarah Schenirer's radical idea of schools for girls in the 1920's and 1930's was an emergency measure because girls were educated in Polish public schools and were dropping out of Yiddishkeit.

Although I can see how R' Miller's approach is true to Torah, it is troubling because of all the fine, frum people we know about who were destroyed and the destruction of frum life, shuls, sifrei Torah, yeshivos, i.e. those who did follow the Torah.  Furthermore, we don't see how destroying European Jewry accomplished anything.  Numerous assimilated Jews escaped or survived and numerous religious Jews who survived dropped their observance.  You had the resilient few who were frum previously and remained frum.  We don't see a mass teshuva movement happening during the war and subsequent to it.  That doesn't happen until decades later.  If the goal was to get European Jews back on track, did the Holocaust accomplish that? No.  And if that was not the goal, was the goal just to punish? Then why did so many assimilated Jews escape and so many pious Jews perish? But then, R' Miller is not talking about a goal; he is saying the Holocaust was a natural consequence of our behavior as spelled out in the Torah.

I'd find it interesting to read a sampling of book reviews written by Holocaust survivors.

"A Divine Madness"

 

A book with Rabbi Avigdor Miller z'l's perspective on the Holocaust has been published, posthumously.  It is quite provocative and controversial to the point that in a full-page ad, it shows the book surrounded by people's opinions:

"I would recommend this book to every Jew."

"I honestly would be terrified to give this book to a non-observant person."

"Solely defended the justice of the HaKadosh boruch Hu."

"This is a big change from the usual approach."

"I feel that this book stands at the brink of a crossroads in Jewish History.  The Jewish world can either choose to read it and take heed of its message, or carry on and reject it."

"I think this book should be banned."

"I'm buying ten copies for my children and rabbinical friends."

"Not likely to be a popular message."

"Hard to put down.  Read it in one sitting."

"The notes distracted me from the book's readability."

And the ad says: You Judge.  Your comments are appreciated.  First printing sold out. 

to be continued

The Seminary High

A woman whose daughter went to seminary in Israel for a year, said she wants her daughter to have six months back home before dating so she can see who she really is and not date from a "seminary high." 

That got me thinking.  Why does this mother think that the "real" person is the one who comes down from her inspiration? Maybe the inspired person is the real person? How are we defining real?

An analogy, you go to an event or shiur and are inspired by the speaker.  Is that real or not? You know how when are you excited by what you heard, you want to tell people about it? Would it be a good idea to wait a week or a month before telling anyone so the inspiration will wear off and the real you will be back? I don't think so ...

But I do understand where that mother is coming from.  It's one thing to sit in a classroom, having all expenses paid for, usually by one's parents, and being inspired to marry a ben Torah and enable him to learn for years to come.  Actually being married and living that life is another thing.  So the mother figures that six months down the road, reality will set in.  If the girl still feels strongly about her religious undertakings and ambitions, she will say so and date accordingly (though even then, it's not like actually being married).  But to date while on a high can be a dangerous proposition because you can end up married based on idealistic commitments that are not as desirable as time goes on.

R' Avigdor Miller z'l felt otherwise.  He said a girl should go from graduation to the chuppa for precisely that reason.  She is idealistic and should marry in that state and it will uplift her future life.

Loyalty - Old Fashioned or Still Current?

I took part in a lively discussion today about loyalty.  One person, who seemed to equating loyalty with hakaras ha'tov (gratitude), maintained that although people will say it's a valuable trait, it is nevertheless, quite a rare commodity these days. 

Someone else said that loyalty is highly regarded in her family.  To illustrate, an aunt in Russia in her teens, without parents and having the opportunity to leave communist Russia, remained there for the next thirty years.  Why? Because her brother had been wounded and who would take care of him? If he couldn't walk, she needed to be there for him! This wasn't about hakaras ha'tov; it was about family sticks together and I stand by you, no matter what. 

Someone called that devotion and tossed in the idea that Rabbi Avigdor Miller z'l said that marriage is not about romance; it is about loyalty and devotion.

This led to a discussion about patronizing family members and friends when you need services that they provide.  Although supporting family and friends is an act of loyalty, it is also a potential minefield.  Stories abound about fallings-out, disappointments and unhappiness when doing business with friends and relatives.  Some maintain that business and friendship should remain separate.  The counter-argument presented today was, if you don't support a friend in business, then how are you a friend?

A related question, are we loyal customers or do we shop wherever it's cheaper? Do I have a halachic obligation to be a loyal customer? What about a halachic obligation to be loyal to family? The mitzva of "not ignoring your own flesh [and blood]" comes to mind.

And if loyalty is faithfulness, then an example in the Torah is Moshe whom Hashem describes as being faithful, ne'eman to Him.  Another Torah source for loyalty-devotion-faithfulness is the reason only certain kinds of birds (the tor and the bnei yona) are brought as sacrifices; because they exhibit loyalty and faithfulness.  Any other sources?

The Famous Apple Video

In honor of Rabbi Avigdor Miller z'l's eleventh yartzeit, here are a classic few minutes of his teachings: Apple Video

Find Someone Capable and Pay!

I was listening to lecture #300 of R' Avigdor Miller's famous Thursday night classes in the course of which he denounced psychiatrists and psychologists.  In the question and answer session, someone asked who to turn to when that sort of help is needed and his answer was, go to someone capable.  He went on to say that in his experience, shlimazals become the psychiatrists and psychologists.  They are people with the same problems they purport to address.

He said people are foolish when they pay a lot of money for professional sessions but don't offer a single dollar to someone capable who is willing to give of his time when he is not a professional.  He said it's not so easy to find proper counselors but stay away from those with diplomas!

Well, R' Miller was not known for mincing words.  His bluntness was quite refreshing though sometimes hard to hear.  This lecture was probably said back in the 70's.  Would he feel any differently today? I don't know.  It's possible he responded to a similar question much later on on a tape I did not hear.

His main point is well taken - go to someone capable! Why does such an obvious thing need to be stated? Because many people think that a diploma means you're capable.  Counselors can be incompetent and give bad advice.  A degree does not confer wisdom on anyone.  Furthermore, a degree means the professional had to master material that goes contrary to Torah ideas. 

Are there capable, frum professionals today? Yes, I believe so.  Nevertheless, I think it's good to be reminded that competence is the key.

Shaar Ha'Bechina with Rav Miller's commentary

I am in the middle of reading-learning the Chovos Ha'Levavos-Duties of the Mind, Shaar Ha'Bechina-Gateway of Reflection.  This is a wonderful edition which has the text in Hebrew (a translation from the Arabic) and a translation and commentary based on the lectures of Rabbi Avigdor Miller z"l. 

If I had to guess, I would think that Rabbi Miller's favorite subject was Shaar Ha'Bechina and that of all his thousands of shiurim, it is the topic that came up the most often.  Shaar Ha'Bechina is about reflecting on the world around us and recognizing that everything in the world teaches us that Hashem made the world with wisdom and kindness, with purpose and planning, and that the end result is for our benefit.  This is what engenders love for Hashem.  For those of us who heard Rabbi Miller, whether in person or on tape, we can hear his voice as we read the commentary, his unique manner of conveying the truth and wisdom of Torah.

I have been in touch with the publisher which is the Yeshiva Gedolah Bais Yisroel, the yeshiva Rav Miller founded.  He told me that the way to purchase the sefer is either to buy it from Torah Treasures on Ave L and Nostrand in Brooklyn or from Rabbi Brog on 1474 E. 10th St in Brooklyn, phone number 718-998-5996.  Alternatively, it can be bought online:

click here to order sefer online