This same R' Bensoussan (see previous post) said that on his way to or from shul on Shabbos, his father would say to him and his brothers, time and again, each time as though he never said it before, “This is very important. No matter where you end up and what you do, there is nothing as amazing, as beautiful as Shabbat.”
During the meal his father would almost break into tears and say there is nothing like Shabbat. R' Bensoussan's friends would break Shabbat in front of him but he never could. As he put it, why would he want to break Shabbat? There is no beauty that compares! He doesn't use the phone, text etc. on Shabbat because why would he?! He has Shabbat.
So this seems to be the new approach to convey the imperative of living a religiously observant life. It's not because G-d said so. It's not because of reward and punishment. It's because it's beautiful and enjoyable.
Sounds nice, but ... where does G-d fit into the picture? It sounds like it's all about me and what makes me feel good. Nothing about a relationship with G-d. Dovid Ha'Melech's pining for G-d seems irrelevant. Purpose, responsibility, obligation seem to play no role. It's all about my pleasure. Something is wrong with this picture, though apparently many feel this is what speaks to today's youth. Do they ever move on to the next level or is that not a goal?
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I think that we have to say that Shabbos was beautiful because on that day we are closer to Hashem. We are closer to Hashem because we are observing the Shabbos the way that He commanded it.
ReplyDeleteI think that when we punish children for not keeping mitzvahs, especially chumrahs, we give them the attitude that it is all about us and our approval rather than how Hashem feels about the behavior.
I once hosted a family for Shabbos where the mother was hospitalized due to a lengthy illness. The little boy did not want to wash for HaMotzei and the more that the father tried to force it, the more the child resisted. I told the boy that whenever a child made a bracha, a large chorus of angels said amein and Hashem enjoyed the bracha and the chorus, especially when it came from a little child. The child couldn't wait to make the melachim and Hashem happy. He ran to the sink to wash his hands.
The father could have punished the child but the child would have always associated performing mitzvahs with obeying the father rather than pleasing Hashem.
You should be a preschool/early elementary school teacher!
ReplyDeleteRe harshness, that is what R' Bensoussan was emphasizing, that the harshness is counterproductive. But it seems to me that he is going to the opposite extreme, to narcissistic Judaism.